CRISTINA ROSE 0:04


Hey friends, welcome to this week’s episode today we have the insightful and Natalie on the podcast, a passionate advocate addressing the unspoken challenges women faced post childbirth, she empowers mothers in their 40s and beyond to reclaim their bodies and vitality with practical knowledge and competence. Natalie, thank you so much for coming on the podcast today, I really can’t wait to dive into our topic.

NATALIE GARAY 0:29


Thank you. I appreciate you having me. Thank you.

CRISTINA ROSE 0:31


So what advice do you have for women, you know, in their 40s, you know, feeling overwhelmed by their physical changes, you know, and how to regain that confidence back?

NATALIE GARAY 0:42


Yeah. Yeah, it’s around that 40 year mark. What I found with my clients is that they’re kind of having this moment this pause, it’s, you know, most of them have kids who are older and a lot more independent now and able to care for themselves. So the moms aren’t necessarily having to meet every single, you know, demand or need as much as if they were toddlers. And so they have a moment, with enough time to finally go, oh, my gosh, what has happened, I feel like a wreck, you know, they’re finally noticing when they get a moment of pause, that they’re feeling exhausted, or they’re achy, or their brains aren’t quite functioning, which they may have noticed before, but couldn’t necessarily address or take the time to address. And so now is that WTF moment? And they’re trying to figure out what to do. So a lot of them are searching Google, like, Why do I not feel like myself? Why am I lethargic? Why do I have this brain fog. And I would say that the moment came for me years ago, and I found that movement to just starting with simple movement was the best way to start, whether it’s taking a walk each day, whether that’s 10 to 15-30 minutes, or, you know, finding a great yoga class or Pilates class. I mean, of course, I’m biased. I’ve been Pilates instructor for 20 years. So that’s my go to, I think, the greatest and best for anybody and everybody. So it really does start with movement, because then that kind of creates a little bit more of an energy shift, you’re finally feeling you know, a little bit of strength, awareness in your body, mind clarity, and then things just start to click after that. And that’s what my, my suggested my go to, it’d be just start with a little bit of movement, and it’ll change over time. You know, maybe you start with a walk and you’re like, Okay, this is cool. I might start jogging a little bit. Or, and this is super cool. I love the feeling of jogging. Oh, well, you know what, I’m gonna sign up for that 5k that I saw before, and it just kind of progresses from there.

CRISTINA ROSE 2:41


Ya know, I mean, people underestimate how important just walking is, you know, and it really is a great step and has a lot of beneficial value, especially if you do walks without technology, and you just really see the environment and be with yourself. And sometimes we forget to even just take the moment to listen to what’s really going on inside kinda like what you mentioned. Because we’re so busy and overwhelmed with the distractions. Parents, you need the addicted child, a parent’s guide to adolescent substance abuse by Richard Capriola. It’s a must have for understanding teen substance use and learning the warning signs every parent should know the addicted Child A Parent’s Guide to adolescent substance abuse by Richard cabriolet. And here’s the kicker, Richard spills, the beans on explaining substance used by today’s adolescents and how drugs work in the teen brain. He’s even included important warning signs for self harm, and eating disorders and how to find the right help for your team. And the best part is, you’re getting all of these mind blowing insights without breaking the bank. If you’re a parent or know someone who is this book is going to be your secret weapon, Kindle or paperback grab your copy on Amazon or go to help the addicted child.com The sites in this book are pure gold and spread the word share the love and let’s empower ourselves with knowledge. Now and I know also other things happen with our bodies, you know, how can women in their 40s you know tackle issues like the incontinence and the pelvic organ prolapse? You know after childbirth. You work on those types of things.

NATALIE GARAY 4:24


Yeah, incontinence, pelvic organ prolapse, C section rehabilitation diastasis recti, which is the abdominal gap the gap in the abdominals and that happens during pregnancy.

CRISTINA ROSE 4:35


I had that my first pregnancy really, really bad. Yeah, I had two C sections. And so it’s like, we got to regain that stomach muscle back, you know?

NATALIE GARAY 4:45


Yeah. Just like you were saying as far as walking being underrated or underestimated. It’s the same for your abdominals and we don’t really understand how much power and how much strength our abdominals hold and how much they’re nice You did. And when we go through a pregnancy, or two, or three or four each time, it just takes a toll on our body, not just our abdominals, but the whole overall Bolat body, our pelvis and all, we’re stretching muscles each time. And so abdominal strength is huge and important for supporting the pelvis, for supporting the spine for supporting our posture. So if we want to eliminate, you know, those every day, aches and aches and pains, like we get in our hips, or that sciatic pain that we get, or our neck pain, which is due to posture, it all comes down to your abdominal strength. Pelvic Floor, specifically, you’re going to need those pelvic floor muscles rehabilitated. And that’s one thing that we don’t necessarily get information about when we’re pregnant, or when we have kids. For instance, I know that in France, you are prescribed what they call a coach, and they send you home with a pelvic floor specialist. So that’s internal pelvic floor work to let you know is your pelvic floor functioning properly. If not, here are the exercises and things that you need to do. But since we’re not getting that here, there are internal physical therapists that you can see to measure your pelvic floor strength. Physical therapy should be prescribed and required after every pregnancy, but especially after a C section because that is a major surgery. And I had to as well Yeah. And so there are simple exercises. Again, I’m gonna go and talk about Pilates, because I think a lot and that’s what I’ve used to help my clients rehabilitate Pilates was how I was able to help many women, eliminate if not, you know, completely decrease or really decrease their incontinence issues, their pelvic organ prolapse, close up their abdominal gap from their diastasis.

CRISTINA ROSE 6:52


I had like, I had someone didn’t insurance didn’t cover it. So I just paid it. Yeah, a pocket just for a few sessions, because she was able to measure how it’s like you lay down on your back and like you stick like the four fingers in your pelvis, and you sit up and we can see how like deep and far it goes. And that’s how you can measure. Yes. And you know, the gap in your abdominals, your abdominals. Yeah, what she did was like, I had to do kind of like yoga exercises stuff. And she did like some massaging and on she helped close it up. I mean, it really did make a difference in like, the way my stomach even looked, you know?

NATALIE GARAY 7:32


Oh, yeah, absolutely. I’ve had clients come to me, and they’re not necessarily concerned about, or initially, they might not know the necessity of it, or the need for it. And they’re more concerned about looking, you know, three months pregnant still, you know, a year or two late later, which I can completely understand. But there’s so much more to it, because if you hadn’t, if you hadn’t strengthened or close up that gap, you might not feel it. Now, you’re going to feel it many years later. And a lot of misconception is that you have to have surgery in order to support to fix that, and you don’t and that’s one of the things I like to tell my clients too is we can definitely decrease it significantly, if not eliminate it entirely. But yes, it’s that abdominal separation between the fascial layers, and it’s right up and down either above the belly button or below the belly button, and you can measure it like you did with your fingers. And sometimes you if you do rounded motion, you might see something kind of pushed outward, which is a little unnerving. But you can definitely close that up so that you have that, that fulfillment of your abdominals and the support for your spine and pelvis that’s needed.

CRISTINA ROSE 8:47


Yeah, You know, we talked a lot about like, the physical aspects of like the body. How can you know mothers address like the hormone imbalances? Post childbirth.

NATALIE GARAY 8:58


Well, we as women go through so many hormone shifts, we you know, puberty and then pregnancy and post pregnancy, and then again, in our late 30s, mid 40s, and then in 50s, and we don’t necessarily work, there’s a lot more conversation around hormones lately, at least that’s what I’m seeing. And we’re not leaving it until we turned 50-55 to talk about hormones anymore, which everyone kind of you know, it’s a daunting that timeframe is daunting or is going oh god menopause. But we need to look at the shifts that happened prior to that, not only for overall health, because hormone shifts will decrease muscle strength and the pelvis. So that’s when women start to more so maybe experience their pelvic floor weakness issues, incontinence, etc. But if we can address it earlier than we don’t necessarily need to experience it come those later years. So, you know, hormones have been an interesting subject. It’s something that you can certainly test for. What I found and what I’ve heard from many is that if you go to Get your general GP and you’re asking for a hormone test, they may say something along the lines of, oh, it’s so hard to test your hormones because they shift so much throughout the day. Which is true, but there are certain tests that you can ask for, that will show you what you need to know. And what I’ve learned. And what I’ve read is that if you have a general PT, general physician who’s open to that, great, if not, then you can certainly find someone such as a functional medicine doctor who’s completely open and, you know, ready to order those tests for you to support you. On you know, looking at it in different ways.

CRISTINA ROSE 10:42


Which test should people be, you know, kind of asking for?

NATALIE GARAY 10:47


There’s a couple that I the one I know for sure is a Dutch hormone test. And that there’s urine tests, and there’s blood tests. Yeah. So a couple of people that I follow on Instagram that would have more information about this than I do would be Dr. Jolene, Brighton. And Dr. Marie Claire, I believe is her name. So I follow them, I get a lot of my information about hormones from them. I mean, I’ve had several, not several to two separate hormone tests. I’ve done a saliva test, I’ve done a urine test. I’ll take that back three. I’ve also had a blood test. So as I’m 47, I wanted to find out where I was in my perimenopausal menopausal, you know, process. And it turns out, I’m perimenopausal which is, you know, I guess on spot for 47. And then suppose you know, at some point, maybe my cycles will end. But for me because my mother passed from dementia about three years ago. And because I’m learning how hormones play a role in our cognitive health, it was important for me to really deep dive deep into what my body needed as far as micronutrients, hormone balancing. You know, how food plays a role in that and I found all of those tests really helpful for my functional medicine doctor. So acupuncture is another key component to balancing hormones.

CRISTINA ROSE 12:26


Yeah it’s important we gotta like, keep track, you know, not wait to the last minute, you know, we gotta be proactive in our health.

Well, Natalie, it is time for the Power Mom Chronicles and I cannot wait to find out what your answers are.

And my first one to you is once a game changing lesson life has taught you?

NATALIE GARAY 12:50


That movement is important. It’s not you know, it’s underrated, for sure. And it’s something we’ve heard about forever. That movement is life changing. And I’ve had three significant life changing shifts in my life that all started with a movement practice different movement practices. One was a Pilates practice as a solo mom with three daughters committing to a three times a week, Pilates practice, was a game changer. I completely changed my energy, my body, my brain, how I parented and how I started and started my businesses. So it was something I was teaching and preaching, non stop, because I was a Pilates instructor was not something I was practicing. So that was a huge life lesson. And then again, I did it was yoga practice that changed my life too. So those two I would say were huge.

CRISTINA ROSE 13:51


Yeah, and reflecting on your journal, what practical lessons or insights can our listeners apply to improve their own lives? I know you were talking a lot about exercise, but I wonder if there’s anything else that we can do to help improve our day to day lives?

NATALIE GARAY 14:06


Well, I always start with a morning routine, which is a morning meditation and in morning, journaling, practice. And then I have some, you know, favorite oracle cards that I pull from, and I just really like to take the time. You know, a few minutes if that’s all I have, I have more time now because my kids are older, up to 20 minutes. And I take that time in the morning every morning just to kind of check in journal what came through and my dreams that night, the night before what happened the day before just kind of reflecting and setting myself up for the day rather than just jumping into it. And then chaos ensues. You know, I really take the time to like, really focus and get into my body before jumping into the day and just tackling tests, whatever that is.

CRISTINA ROSE 14:54


And offer a piece of wisdom for moms or anyone really trying to strike I’m to find their strength and voice

NATALIE GARAY 15:04


Advice for moms finding their voice. You know, it’s gonna, I’m just sound repetitive because it is really just a check in and a movement practice. Anytime you can really get in tune with your body and listen to it, it takes some practice to really just tune in and listen to what your body’s telling you. Sometimes it’s going to tell you to sit your ass down and not do anything that day or take more time for reflection. And sometimes it’s go time and you have the energy and the will and the strength to do that. And then you just go it’s really about, checking in without sounding too fluffy, checking in with yourself and listening to your body and what it’s trying to tell you.

CRISTINA ROSE 15:49


And the best advice you’ve ever received.

NATALIE GARAY 15:53


The best is that bested by gosh, I’m the only one that comes to mind right away, because it was advice I didn’t take. It’s gonna sound really simple and silly what it was about raising my daughters, because they’re so close to my age. And it was just me, one of my friends and previous employers who had a daughter said, You know what, the best thing I can tell you is, listen, when they come to you with interest in boys, or whatever their preference is. Don’t act surprised or don’t take it. Don’t be alarmed. And don’t act alarmed. Just go Oh, really? What else do you want to tell me about him and just kind of listen? Yeah, and I took the opposite approach of what? What’s his name? Where does he live, whatever, you know, just kind of being a little too on guard. And so that kind of backfired.

CRISTINA ROSE 16:58


That is some great advice. Like I’ve never really heard that. But it is true. Just kind of like keep your cool. Yeah

NATALIE GARAY 17:03


Keep your cool and just listen, because if not, they’re not going to tell you shit and you just don’t want that. Yeah. So that was one thing I do remember and it’s not you know, it’s not groundbreaking, but it would have been helpful to follow that piece.

CRISTINA ROSE 17:22


Well, Natalie, thank you so much for coming on this week’s episode of “Not Your Momma’s Podcast”. All of her links are down below in the show notes. Don’t be shy. Go say hi. And I hope to see you all in the next one. Thanks for listening